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The Position of Women in Hindu Civilisation, from Prehistoric Times to the Present Day c10.s2: Section 2: Widow Remarriage

The Position of Women in Hindu Civilisation, from Prehistoric Times to the Present Day c10.s2

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Section 2: Widow Remarriage

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Side by side with Niyoga, the widow remarriage also prevailed in Vedic society. The suggestion that the proposal for a remarriage was made to the widow at the funeral of her husband is preposterous; it is based upon a wrong interpretation of a Vedic stanza¹. There is however no doubt that widow remarriages used to take place not infrequently in the Vedic age.

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¹ **उदीर्ध्वं नार्यभिजीवलोकं गतासुमेतमुपशेष एहि ।** **हस्तग्राभस्य दिधिषोस्तवेदं पत्युर्जनित्वमभिसंबभूथ ॥** *R. V.*, X, 18,8. The verse seeks to dissuade the widow from burning herself on her husband's funeral pyre by following the archaic Satī custom, which had gone out of vogue. Its correct translation is as follows :—'Oh lady, get up, come back to the world of the living; you are lying by the side of a dead person. As far as thy wifehood to thy husband, who had seized thy hand (in marriage), is concerned, you have lived it out completely.' Those, who see in this verse a proposal for remarriage, translate the last line in the following way :—'Thy wifehood to me, who has seized thy hand and who is thy lover, has now commenced.' This is, however, a wrong translation. It is, however, surprising to find that Sāyaṇa should support this interpretation; cf:—**त्वं हस्तग्राभस्य पाणिग्राहवतो दिधिषोः पुनर्विवाहेच्छोः पत्युरेत्तज्जनित्वं जायात्वमभिसंबभूथ आभिमुख्येन सम्यक्प्राप्नुहि ।** On *Tai. Araṇ*, VI, 1.

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In one place the Atharvaveda refers to a woman marrying a second time. It lays down a ritual to secure the union of the new couple in heaven². It is therefore clear that the author of this hymn did not regard the conduct of the widow who remarried, as in any way disreputable; had he regarded it as objectionable, he would not have recommended a ritual to facilitate her union with the second husband in heaven.

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² **या पूर्वं पतिं वित्त्वा अथान्यं विन्दते पतिम् ।** **पञ्चौदनं च तौ अजं ददातो न वियोजतः ॥** **समानलोको भवति पुनर्भूवा अपरः पतिः ।** **योऽजं पञ्चौदनं दक्षिणाज्योतिषं ददाति ॥** IX, 5, 29-8.

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In the passage of the Atharvaveda referred to above, there is no suggestion to the effect that the widow in question is to marry her brother-in-law. It would therefore appear that some widows in the Vedic age used to marry outside the circle of their late husbands' families. The usual procedure for the widow, however, seems to have been to marry a younger brother-in-law, who was very often unmarried at the time. It is therefore difficult to determine whether in a particular place the reference is to a regular remarriage with an unmarried brother-in-law, or to merely a Niyoga relation with him. References like those in Ṛigveda X, 40, 2 seem to contemplate Niyoga rather than a regular marriage with the brother-in-law¹. References to regular remarriages of widows in Vedic literature are few, probably because Niyoga was then more popular than remarriage. At this period, however, a widow could get as many as three sons by Niyoga ; so the Niyoga relationship practically amounted to a remarriage.

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¹ को वां शयुत्रा विधवेव देवरम् । R.V., X, 40, 2.

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Though actual instances of widow remarriages, that can be clearly distinguished from Niyoga are few, they must not have been infrequent in society. For the Dharmasūtras (*c.* 400 B.C. to *c.* 100 A.D.) allow remarriage even when the death of the husband was only presumed and not proved. Thus Vasishṭha says that even a Brahmana lady with living children need wait only for five years, if her husband, gone out on a journey, does not return. *If she is unwilling to go to him,* she should marry a near relative; only she should not wed outside the family, if there is an eligible person within it¹. Vasiṣṭha is not here referring to Niyoga, for he extends this permission even to women having living children. Kauṭilya (III, 4) and Nārada (XII, 88 ff.) have laid down similar rules. The former reduces the period of waiting to a few months only, and allows even women married by regular religious rites to enter into a fresh wedlock². This permission was availed of even in high class families. Uḍupī was a widow, and she practically compelled Arjuna to marry her. In Uchchaṅga Jātaka, a lady when given an option of choice between a husband, a son and a brother, choses the last mentioned one, observing that she can easily get another husband or son, but not another brother³. In Nanda Jātaka (No. 39) we come across a husband shuddering at the prospect of his youthful wife marrying again after his death, and not giving any share of his property to his son.

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¹ प्रोषितपत्नी पञ्च वर्षाण्युदीक्षेत। ऊर्ध्वं पञ्चभ्यो वर्षेभ्यो भर्तृसकाशं गच्छेत्। यदि धर्मार्थाभ्यां प्रवासं प्रत्यननुकामा स्यात् यथा प्रेते एवं वर्तितव्यं स्यात्। एवं ब्राह्मणी पञ्च प्रजाता अप्रजाता चत्वारि। अत ऊर्ध्वं समानोदकपिण्डर्षिगोत्राणां पूर्वः पूर्वः गरीयान्। न तु खलु कुलीने विद्यमाने परगामिनी स्यात्। XVII, 67.

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² जीवितार्थमापद्गता वा धर्मविवाहात्कुमारी परिगृहीतारमनाख्याय प्रोषितं श्रूयमाणं सप्ततीर्थान्याकांक्षेत संवत्सरं श्रूयमाणमाख्याय।

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³ उत्संगे देव मे पुत्ते पथे धावंतिया पती। III, 4.

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Widow remarriages were, however, gradually coming into disrepute during the period 300 B. C. to 200 A. D. When urged to make peace on the last day of the war, Duryodhana says that he is disinclined to enjoy the earth as a man is to marry a widow¹. Dharmasūtra writers usually place the son of a widow low in their scheme of succession. In *Aṅguttara Nikāya* we see a lady assuring her husband on his death bed that she would never remarry after his death, but would look after the household and children².

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¹ क्षीणरत्नां च पृथिवीं हतक्षत्रियपुंगवाम् । न ह्युत्सहाम्यहं भोक्तुं विधवामिव योषितम् ॥ IX, 31, 45.

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² सिया खो पन ते गहपति एवमस्स, नकुलमाता गहपतानी ममच्चयेन अञ्ञं घरं गमिस्सति । III, p. 295.

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Owing to the growing influence of the ascetic ideals, the opposition to widow remarriage began to grow stronger and stronger from *c.* 200 A. D. Vishṇu recommends celibacy to the widow. Manu lays down that a widow should never even think of remarriage after her husband's death³. Nārada (*c.* 500 A. D.) can think of a girl's marriage only once (XII, 28). Elsewhere, however, he allows a woman to remarry if her husband had expired, or entered a monastery, or gone out on a long journey. Parāśara concurs with this view⁴. The contradictory provisions, that we sometimes come across in works like *Nāradasmṛiti* of this period, would show that though widow marriages were getting unpopular in Brahmana community, they were still common among the other classes. The famous emperor Chandragupta Vikramāditya, (*c.* 375-414 A. D.), who was probably a Vaiśya by caste, had married his elder brother's wife after the death of her husband. Kumāragupta, a son of this union, became an heir to the Gupta empire.

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³ न तु नामापि गृह्णीयात्पत्यौ प्रेते परस्य वै । V, 157.

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⁴ नष्टे मृते प्रव्रजिते क्लीबे च पतिते पतौ । पञ्चस्वापत्सु नारीणां पतिरन्यो विधीयते ॥

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It is important to add that the opponents of the widow remarriage of this period were not against the remarriage of child widows. The prevalence of early marriages at this time had raised the problem of the child widow, and it was at first sympathetically solved by society. Social thinkers represented in the later portion of the Mahābhārata declare that no derogation would attach to a child widow if she married again; her sons would be fully entitled to offer oblations both to gods and manes¹.

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¹ पुनर्भूरपि सा कन्या सपुत्रा ऽव्यकव्यदा। XIII, 55, 7.

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The earlier writers of the Dharmaśāstra also adopt a sympathetic attitude towards the child widow. Thus Vasishṭha states that if merely the marriage ritual is performed and the marriage itself is not consummated, the girl should be married again². Baudhāyana holds the same view (II, 2, 4, 7). Laghu-Śātātapa holds that such a girl is really a virgin, and she should marry again as a matter of course³.

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² पाणिग्राहे मृते बाला केवलं मन्त्रसंस्कृता। सा चेदक्षतयोनिः स्यात्पुनः संस्कारमर्हति ॥ XVII, 66.

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³ उद्वाहिता च या कन्या न संप्राप्ता च मैथुनम्। भर्तारं पुनरभ्येति यथा कन्या तथैव सा। v. 44.

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From about 600 A. D. the prejudice against the widow remarriage began to become deeper and deeper. Smṛiti writers from this period onwards begin to condemn them vehemently. Passages in earlier works clearly permitting them began to be explained away as referring to a bygone age. The *Ādityapurāṇa* declares that widow remarriage is not to be performed in the Kali age¹. A widow’s son could not be invited for a Śrāddha. Referring to the permission for his sacred initiation given by earlier texts, Laghu-Aśvalāyana states frankly that it may have been a good and valid custom in a former age, but it can no longer be followed in the present times². Mādhava, while commenting upon the famous text in Parāśara permitting remarriage, observes that it is no longer valid in the Kali age.

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¹ ऊढायाः पुनर्वाहं ज्येष्ठांशं गोवधं तथा । कलौ पंच न कुर्वीत भ्रातृजायां कमण्डलुम् ॥

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² युगान्तरे स धर्मः स्यात्कलौ निन्य इति स्मृतः । XXI, 14.

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From about 1000 A. D. the prohibition of remarriage began to be extended even to the cases of child widows. Devaṇabhaṭṭa (*c.* 1150 A. D.) states that the texts sanctioning remarriages in such cases have no application to the present age³. A section of the puritanical school tried to extend the denotation of the term widow. It was argued that girls betrothed verbally, nay even mentally, should be regarded as married. If perchance their husbands died before the performance of the marriage ritual, they should be regarded as widows and become ineligible for remarriage⁴. If by mistake a person married such a ‘widow,’ he was to perform a penance and abandon her. The marriage was invalid *ab initio*¹. Luckily this absurd doctrine did not appeal to society; it continued to be guided by Manu's sensible opinion that no marital tie arises before the marriage ritual is actually performed.

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³ एवं च यानि संस्कारादूर्ध्वमक्षतयोन्याः पुनरुद्वाहपराणि तानि युगान्तराभिप्रायाणीति मन्तव्यम् । *SCS.*, p. 221.

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⁴ सप्त पौनर्भवाः कन्यः वर्जनीयाः कुलाधमाः । वाचा दत्ता मनो दत्ता कृतकौतुकमंगला ॥ Kaśyapa in *SCS.*, p. 202.

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¹ अज्ञातस्तु द्विजो यस्तु विधवामुद्वहेद्यदि । परित्यज्य च वै तां च प्रायश्चित्तं समाचरेत् ॥ Laghu-Aśvalāyana, XXI, 6.

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Though this move to extend the meaning of the term widow failed, widow remarriages disappeared almost completely from society from about 1100 A. D. Even child widows could not be married. This prohibition, however, became operative only in the higher sections of Hindu society. As far as its lower strata were concerned,—and they form more than 80 per cent. of the community,—remarriages continued to be current among them. It was only in the last century that out of a desire to increase their respectability, some lower classes began to impose upon themselves the prohibition of widow marriage. The tendency has now disappeared.

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Let us now examine the consequences of the prohibition of Niyoga and remarriage. The school advocating the recognition of the right of inheritance of the widow got an additional ground in its favour when they ceased to remarry. If widows were not to remarry or have any Niyoga relations, it was but fair that they should be conceded a share in the property of their husbands, to whom they were showing signal fidelity in most trying circumstances. Another consequence, and a sad one, followed the discontinuance of the widow remarriage. Many young widows found it a hard ordeal to lead a life of enforced celibacy and began to prefer to die with their husbands, rather than live behind them. The custom of Satī therefore became more general. Some widows, however, had not the courage to go through this inhuman fiery ordeal; nor had they sufficient strength of mind and character to live up to the high ascetic ideal prescribed for them. It is sad to record that they were driven to lead the life of a concubine or *avaruddhā strī*. The *Kāmasūtra* informs us that a widow, unable to lead a celibate life, used to approach a rich person, who used to accept her as wife without the formality of any religious marriage¹. If she found it difficnlt to pull on well with him, she would have recourse to another person. It is difficult to state what percentage of widows was driven to this sad life, but probably it was not large.

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¹ विधवा त्विन्द्रियदौर्बल्यादा...रा भोगिनं गुणसंपन्नं विन्देत। सौख्यार्थिनी क्लान्यं विन्देत । IV, 2.

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In the absence of definite data, it is difficult to state what percentage of widows used to avail themselves of the opportunity of remarriage when it was permitted to them. Probably women with children did not usually think of remarriage. Among the rest also, many had a genuine love for their departed spouses and would not therefore think of remarriage. They tried, and tried with admirable success, to wade through the dreary life of widowhood, supported by their devotion to their husbands and such consolation as religion could afford. A few welcomed escape through the dreadful door of the Satī custom, when it became popular in later times. Some, however, found the ordeal of celibacy too trying and had recourse to remarriage. When that door was closed, they were driven to concubinage. This development should have induced society to change its attitude towards widow remarriage. The ascetic ideal of life had, however, acquired a complete ascendancy over the social mind. A large number of Jain, Buddhist and Hindu monks and nuns were following that ideal, and it was felt that widows also should do the same. Leaders of society should, however, have realised that what a few men and women could do out of intense religious conviction, could not be prescribed for a whole class. They should have realised that if the average widower found it difficult to pass his life without a second marriage, the average widow could not be in a different predicament. Society had, however, ceased to be guided by reason at this time, and had come under the complete sway of authority. Smṛiti texts, and Smṛiti texts too of the most recent date, which interdicted remarriage, were its sole sources of inspiration. Ancient authorities, which clearly permitted the widow remarriage, were silently ignored or ingeniously explained away.

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Leaders of thought of the Hindu society in the medieval period were the writers of law digests and the saints of the Bhakti school. The former were too much under the influence of later Smṛitis to recommend a course opposed to their injunctions. The latter could hardly have championed the cause of the widow remarriage, as they were completely under the influence of the ascetic ideal. The prejudice of Hindu society against widow remarriage began to become deeper and deeper. Nay, it could never conceive the possibility of a respectable widow embarking on a course of remarriage. Tragic cases of girls being widowed at the age of 8 or 9 were often happening in society ; but people regarded them as decrees of an unscrutable Providence and bowed down to them. Parshurambhau Patwardhan, one of the Peshwa generals, had the misfortune of his daughter being widowed at the age of 8 ; contemporary documents show that he thought it extremely unreasonble that such girl widows should not be allowed to remarry. But he could not break away from the tradition and get his daughter remarried.

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It was only with the advent of western ideas during the second quarter of the last century that some leaders of thought began to realise the inequity of compelling widows to lead a life of enforced celibacy. Ishvarchandra Vidyasagar was the chief among them, and he succeeded in getting the necessary legislation passed in the Imperial Council in 1856, permitting widow remarriage under certain conditions. This legislation, however, was too much in advance of time, and did not succeed in giving any appreciable impetus to the cause of widow remarriage. Social reformers, who were championing this cause, were not all sincere in their advocacy. Many of them expressed public apology for their association with widow marriages, and some of them refused to follow the gospel they preached, when eventually occasions arose for them to to contract a second marriage. In these days social and religious boycott was a terrible weapon, which leaders of orthodox thought could use with tremendous effect. So, for a decade or two, even ardent social reformers dare not follow what they preached. More than 99 per cent. of widows also were honestly holding the view that it would be a great sacrilege for them to depart from the established custom. Women are proverbially conservative, even in matters that adversely affect their own welfare.

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The cause of the widow remarriage has begun to make appreciable progress since the beginning of this century. Many sincere workers have come forward to devote themselves to it. The terrible havoc caused by the plague at the beginning of the 20th century made the problem acute. With the wider spread of western education, reason began to reassert itself; Smṛiti texts began to lose their hold, and reformers could point out earlier and more authoritative works which permitted widow remarriage. The angle of vision of society of looking to the problem is rapidly changing; the thinking section now frankly recognises that the cause of the widow marriage is a just one, deserving the sympathy and support of all humane persons. The ascetic and puritanical atmosphere, which is *a sine qua non* for the successful working of the ban on widow marriage, has now completely disappeared from society, probably never to return. The age of reason has returned which refuses to sanction a course for the widows, which widowers are unwilling and unable to follow. The authority of later Smṛitis, which prohibit the widow marrige, is being questioned in the light of the earlier Smṛitis and Śrutis, which permit it. The closer study of social data and statistics is revealing that society becomes an unconscious party to great moral inequities by refusing its sanction to remarriages.

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All these factors are now operating with full force and helping the cause of the widow remarriage. There is, however, much up-hill work still to be done; the number of widows under the age of 15 was as high as 3,16,926 in the census of 1931. It cannot be denied that a large number of them may be anxious and yet unable to remarry.

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