Sexual Life in Ancient India: A Study in the Comparative History of Indian Culture v2.c20.58

v2.c20.58

Rāma might now at first wildly show his sorrow and wrath—his lot was not an undeserved one. And in other ways, too, he seems to us to be too much the Indian ideal king and far too forgetful of the tender and true lover, as which he is so often painted for us. Long has Sītā been suffering in bondage, and he has very often given loud utterance to his yearning to see his wife once more; but now that the bold robber has been slain and his town taken, he that gave himself out to be so heavily stricken by the sorrow of separation, with the utmost calmness first of all has Rāvaṇa burned, then Vibhīṣaṇa dedicated as king, and then at last sends Hanumant to Sītā with tidings of his welfare, and of the end of the evil monster (Rām., vi, 112.22 ff.).² He also shares in a thought that often comes up not in India alone: “In all places a wife can be found, in all places kinsmen by marriage, but I do not see the place where one’s own brother could be found” (Rām., vi, 101.14; cp. 87.13-17; MBh., xiii, 4.30-35).³ In like wise does the Mahābh. speak : “ Knowledge, valour, active skill, power, and strength of character—these are called the inborn (in man) friends (mitrāṇi sahajāni) ; with them it is that the wise live their lives. Dwelling and metal, field, wife, and comrades (suhṛid)—these are called the added (by chance, unessential, upahita) ones ; these a man finds anywhere ” (xii, 139.85-86). A too violent love for one’s wife is in general blameworthy. Sugrīva urges Rāma to have done with his sorrow and despair : “ I, too, have known the great misfortune of learning of my wife being carried off, and I do not thus mourn, nor lose my staunchness. I do not grieve after her, and yet I am but a poor ape. How much the less shouldst thou do so, that art high-minded, well-schooled, and of a firm character ! ” (Rām., iv, 7.5 ff.). The woman is, indeed, an object of the senses (indriyārtha), an instrument of pleasure, to use the Indian’s expression ; she merely is one among the needs of life, such as a seat, a bed, a vehicle, a house, corn, etc. (cp. xiii, 145.4 ff.). It